3 Minute Protein Bread (low carb, sugar free, dairy free*, paleo)

Microwave Protein Bread...in the micro
Just “baked” in the microwave
Made in a 6 inch corningware…perfect for a kid’s (or grown-ups)
peanut butter and jelly
Miss bread and biscuits? Like real, chewy bread that doesn’t come out crumbly and doesn’t require tons of starches that will up your blood sugar faster than you can say tapioca? I know I did…until I devised this versatile recipe that started out being cooked in the oven, but has since been relegated to the microwave and/or waffle iron to ensure good rise and perfect, bready density…not hockey puck-ish texture disguised as bread!

Please try this and let me know what you think. It is far superior to ANY gluten free (especially low carb) bread that I have tried, and we have tried a lot!

Coming soon…modifications to make restaurant quality butter-garlic rolls & cinnamon buns!

Need ingredients? Check Amazon…it will suck buying them the first time, but you will make this stuff again and again and you won’t think twice when it’s time to re-order – cross my heart! Another note, I use subscribe and save for almost all of my baking ingredients that I order online. This saves me 20%…which is huge. You can sign up for subscribe and save and cancel before you get your second order, if you decide you don’t need anymore!

**If you use the links below and make a purchase, I will receive a small commission from Amazon through their affiliate program. It costs you nothing additional and I don’t EVER recommend products that I don’t purchase through Amazon myself…**

1/3 c coconut flour
1/3 c NOW Foods Whey Protein Isolate Pure, 1.2 -Pounds OR NOW Foods Eggwhite Protein, 1.2 Pound (use egg white only for dairy free)
1/3 c Now Foods Psyllium Husk Powder, 24-Ounce

See…a real biscuit (note the biscuit balls that
are pre-made in the container, ready for the
fridge and fresh bread…in 3 MINUTES!

2 tsp baking powder (or 1 tsp baking soda + 1/2 tsp cream of tarter)1 tsp salt
1 cup minus 2 Tbsp water
2 Tbsp Apple Cider Vinegar
4 large-extra large eggs
Butter/Coconut oil for greasing cooking dish

Mix all of the wet ingredients in a large bowl w/ a hand mixer, or use a high powered blender. Add the salt and baking powder and mix well. Add the protein, then the psyllium husks and finally the coconut flour, mixing well after each addition.

Once you have a dough like substance, let it hang out and thicken up for 3-5 minutes. Melt about 1/3 Tbsp butter in your microwave safe dish (I use small corningware or my glass pyrex) and then swirl it around to coat the bottom and about 1/2 inch up the sides. Divide your dough into approximately 7 1/4 c. balls. You are going to cook one at a time…you can save some in the fridge to have hot, fresh rolls in 3 minutes!

When you are ready to make your bread, flatten your dough ball slightly into the prepared microwave container and then flip it over so their is butter/oil all over it. “Bake” it in your microwave, starting at about 1.5 minutes and adding 20 second increments until it is slightly firm in the middle. This make take a few attempts, but err on the side of under-done, as you can always re-nuke it. Once it’s overcooked, it gets rubbery and hard around the edges.  For 1/4 c. dough in a 1 cup pyrex, in my 1200 watt microwave, it takes 2 minutes and 20 seconds to perfect bready, biscuit goodness. 1/3 cup (when I make larger rolls) takes 3 minutes. It’s an art, this microwave baking…


Cranberry pot roast and cheesy cauliflower mash

Cranberry Thyme Pot Roast w/ Easy, Cheesy Cauliflower Mash…the utmost in comfort food!
So, with a little pre-planning, this can be assembled in about 3 minutes in the slowcooker and 5 minutes of hands on time with the microwave. It doesn’t get any easier…or more yummy, especially when it’s 14 degrees outside (seriously, that’s what it is…no exaggeration here, unfortunately…)
So, pre-planning…as a busy Mom of two little ones, I don’t have time to spend hours in the kitchen. I know, travesty, but that’s life these days. Like many of you, we’re busy people, work and play and kids and life all get in the way of the time that we have to prepare good, quality food for our families. Enter…pre-planning.  I’m going to be posting more recipes like this in the very near future, as they have become the crutch that I depend on to ensure there is always food in the fridge for lunches and on the table for dinner…yes, I could  order out, but we can’t afford it and honestly, end up disappointed by the quality for the cost when we do succumb to the ease of restaurant take-out. Not to toot my own horn, but my food just tastes better, and I know exactly what I put in it…and it’s not junk. Sooo…back to pre-planning.  For this to be SUPER easy, you have to have made some cranberry sauce before, and have doubled the recipe, and put about 2 cups in your freezer…remember that next Thanksgiving! (I usually make about 4 times the amount we need…that covers us for a few months!) That’s all…not so tough, right? So, what about if you don’t have cranberry sauce in the freezer? Well, my friend, this is your lucky day. It will take you approximately 30 minutes longer, but only about 3 of that is hands on…and next time you will have pre-planned and you’ll have some there, won’t you?
Ok, so assuming you have no cranberry sauce in your freezer…you need to make some. Rinse your 2 bags of cranberries (we’re pre-planning for next time…remember?!?!) and put them in a saucepan. Add a cup of water (or cider beer if you are feeling adventurous), a couple squirts of citrus (your choice, I usually mix lemon and orange, about 1/3 cup), 1 chopped up apple or pear, a little cinnamon, 1 tsp of stevia glycerite (or 1 cup of sugar) and simmer it all until the cranberries pop and it thickens up a bit. Taste it…if it’s still bitter, add a little more sweetener. It should take about 30 minutes…
Now, cool it a bit and portion it into 1 cup portions (this makes 4 portions-ish) and freeze all but 1 cup, for today’s pot roast, of course…
Now, onto the Pot Roast…
2-3 lb chuck shoulder roast, boneless, thawed or frozen**
1 cup cranberry sauce, fresh or frozen**
1 1/2 cups brewed coffee, hot or cold
1 onion, sliced thinly
3-4 carrots, daikon, parsnip (peeled and cut into 2 inch sections)
Layer the veggies (if using) and onion into the bottom of your slow-cooker. Add the meat. Sprinkle liberally with salt, pepper, ground mustard and onion powder. Turn meat over and pour coffee and cranberry sauce over the meat. Season on bottom side with salt, pepper, mustard and onion powder.
Cook on high for approximately 8 hours or until the meat can be pulled apart with a fork.
**If you are using a frozen chunk of meat, add a couple additional hours. If you are using cranberry sauce from the freezer, add it to the top of the meat after you season it, instead of before. It can be like a cranberry ice cube…it will melt! 🙂
Cheesy Cauliflower Mash (one bowl and 24 minutes…)
1 head of cauliflower
3-4 Tbsp of butter, depending on the size of your cauliflower.
1/3 c. heavy whipping cream
4 ounces (approximately 1/3 block) Mediterranean Herb Cheese (I use Cracker Barrel)
Wash your cauliflower and take off all the green leaves. Cut out any brown spots. Chunk it up into smallish pieces, so that it will all fit in your microwave safe container (preferably glass) with a lid. I use Pyrex. DON’T ADD WATER!!! Cut your butter into 4-5 pats and lay it on top of the florets. Pour the cream over the top. Put on the lid and microwave that bad boy for 22 minutes. This is NOT a typo…it takes awhile.
If you think your microwave is super fast, feel free to check it at 15, 18, 20 and then finally 22, but make sure it is done…you want it super tender and even beginning to get little brown marks on some of the top florets.
Once you get at least a couple brown edges, remove from the microwave and top with the cheese (which you chopped into small chunks while the cauliflower was cooking) and put the lid on it for 1 minute to allow the cheese to melt. Use an immersion blender, regular blender or food processor to puree your cauliflower into the most beautiful, cheesy mash you’ve ever had.
On the off chance that you had a very small head of cauliflower and your mash seems too mushy or watery, simply put it back in the microwave for 4-5 minutes with the lid off. It should thicken right up.
Notes –
1. You can shred your cheese, I just hate grating cheese.
2. The meat it also really good with a healthy helping of thyme.
3.  For a sweeter meat, you can double the cranberry sauce.
4. This would probably work without the coffee, using a dry red wine or even beef stock instead, but it probably won’t be as good.
5. Double down by making a double roast and use the leftovers the next night to make an easy Roasted Veggie Beef stew (recipe coming soon).

Low Carb Vanilla CheeseCake (w/ a nut free crust!)

Make this…just do it. I’ve perfected it by making it at least 10 times and it never lasts long. With my ingredients, I calculate 50 net grams of carbs for the whole cheese cake…that’s less than than one piece at the cheesecake factory, and we typically get 12 GENEROUS slices out of this recipe. For an extra special treat, serve topped with a raspberry puree or a small portion of melted dark chocolate. (No one will know this is low carb…promise!)

1/2 c pork rind flour (food processed until finely ground)
1 c. coconut flakes
2 Tbsp ” target=”_blank”>coconut flour
3 Tbsp coconut oil or melted butter
1 dropper full (approximately 20 drops) Sweet Leaf Sweet Drops Vanilla Creme Flavored Liquid Stevia, 2-Ounce Bottle” target=”_blank”>vanilla stevia

Add coconut flakes to a food processor or high powered blender first. Allow to run until coconut is ground finely, but not until it’s coconut butter. Add remaining ingredients and process until well combined.  Press into the bottom of a springform pan (I use a 12 inch) and set aside.

Heat the oven to 425 and put about 1 inch of water in a pan that can hold your springform in the oven to preheat as well. (This is a water bath, for those of you who don’t often make cheesecake. You can omit this step, but your cheesecake will crack on the top…it will still taste delicious, but may not look like it came from the Cheesecake Factory. Your call 🙂 Prepare your filling as described below.

If your springform is not waterproof, or you aren’t sure, wrap foil around it, going up over the top edge. It might take 2 pieces.

1 cup full fat ricotta (read labels…mine has 2 g carb per 1/4 c serving)
24 oz full fat cream cheese (buy name brand…1 g carb per 1 oz serving)
4 large eggs
1/2 c USA Birch Xylitol – 5lb – NON GMO – Kosher – Gluten Free
5 droppers full (100 drops) SweetLeaf Liquid Stevia, English Toffee, 2 Ounce Bottle English Toffee Stevia (NO SUBS…gives it the perfect carmel-ly flavor)
3 Tbsp canned, full fat coconut milk or heavy whipping cream
1/4 c vanilla extract*

Blend all ingredients in a high powered blender or food processor until well combined. Pour into prepared pan and drop a couple inches on the counter a couple times to get all the air bubbles out.

Place your cheesecake in your prepared water bath (or just in the oven) and turn the oven (which should be at 425) down to 325 and bake your cheesecake for 1 hour and 45 minutes. Turn the oven off and allow your cheesecake to remain in the warm oven for an hour or so. Remove and chill.

DON’T TAKE THE EDGE OFF OF YOUR PAN UNTIL IT’S COOL!!! It will collapse. I tell you this from experience. It’s not pretty folks…but it sure does taste good! Waiting is hard, I know. If you must…just take a spoonful from the piece that will be yours. Don’t ruin the whole cake because of your impatience 🙂

Second note…when you place this in the fridge make sure it’s stable, preferably not balancing on a head of cabbage and a pyrex dish, because (again, from experience) if you accidently hit said head of cabbage and your cheesecake loses it’s balance, it will come flying out of the fridge and land top side down on the floor. You will look slightly pathetic scooping it off the floor and then getting up the remainder with a spoon, however, I won’t judge you…because I’ve been there…

Third note…this freezes beautifully, and will also keep in the fridge for about a week.

*I make my own vanilla by purchasing 1/2 Pound LB Premium Madagascar Bourbon Planifolia Grade A Prime Gourmet 6~7″ plus FREE beans! FREE SHIPPING!” target=”_blank”>vanilla beans in bulk, cutting them in half lengthwise and sticking them in a cheap bottle of vodka or bourbon. Let them hang out for about a month, or longer and you have super affordable vanilla extract with no fillers 🙂 I also made homemade vanilla as gifts one Christmas by buying airplane liquor bottles and putting one bean in each bottle – HUGE HIT!

(Lindsey Slattery is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. This costs you nothing, but if you purchase items that I recommend, I will receive a small percentage of the item’s cost.)

FLAKY Pie Crust (Low Carb, gluten-free, nut-free, primal)

Soooo good. Flaky, like I remember back in my gluten eating day. As someone who doesn’t tolerate nuts very well, I have been trying and trying to create a pie crust that would hold up like it’s nutty and/or gluten filled counterparts, or at least as well as the delicious (high carb) ones that I used to make with tapioca starch and rice flour. I had come up empty until this past weekend when I made a Cheeseburger Pie.  It started off as a cheeseburger quiche, but I didn’t add enough eggs. Much to my delight, it was better than expected, but the filling still needs some tweaking. However, the pie crust was definitely a home run. I can’t wait to try it out in a few different iterations…next up, Chicken pot pie! 🙂

1/2 c. coconut flour
1/4 c. unsweetened (small) grated coconut/flakes
1/4 c. ground up pork rinds (measured after grinding)
1 egg
3 Tbsp butter, melted
2 Tbsp bacon fat, ideally not scalding hot out of a frying pan…

Mix all the dry ingredients in a bowl and add the egg. Mix with your hands, trust me. Add the butter and bacon grease and mix until well combined. It will be a bit more delicate than a standard dough, but it should hold together nicely. Using 2 pieces of parchment paper, roll the dough into a disk large enough for your pie plate, then transfer it to said pie plate. Stick it in the fridge for at least 30-60 minutes so it chills and you get the gorgeous (gluten-y but not) flakes that everyone longs for in a pie crust…

Fill as desired and bake like you would any other crust. For no-bakes…I’m not sure yet, but if you try it, please let me know. I’m thinking 14-16 minutes at 350?